Lovely Leper Lady Lackies!

Currently there are no female leper gnomes in World of Warcraft. There’s not even an unused NPC skin that would allow for them.

The first lady leper was Ressa the Leper Queen. Created for the “Servants of the Betrayer” expansion for the Warcraft TCG in April 2008. She was the only leper gnome of the kind for over 15 years!

Now Warcraft Rumble has added multiple (well, 2) new female leper gnomes! And what the actual heck, they are… CUTE?

These new leper gnomes look amazing. They are clearly lepers, but the style of Warcraft Rumble takes away the unpleasant gross factor and leaves them fun and interesting looking. I especially love the Phantom of the Opera style coloration on their faces. It gives them a ton of personality!

It also appears that Lieutenant Tom “Sizzlepants” Crankle is out as the pilot of the Eletrocutioner 6000 and has been replaced by… wait… is that… Ressa? So maybe they added 1 new female leper gnome, and brought back the Queen of the Lepers. It’s not explicitly stated, but if it is her, I am excited at the idea that she has not been forgotten by the Warcraft team and they still think about using her. Maybe we’ll see her in a future Gnomeregan related quest. Gnomeregan was teased in the Warcraft Classic Season of Discovery announcement. It would be awesome to see her pop-up as a new secret raid boss!

https://warcraft.wiki.gg/wiki/Electrocutioner_6000

https://warcraft.wiki.gg/wiki/Ressa_the_Leper_Queen

Hear Me Out: Race Squish

The character creation screen is getting a little crowded.

The allied races were something that I personally wanted for a long time. What we ended up getting was not exactly what I had hoped for. To me, the dark ranger customizations are perfect. I like the story quests to explain the new options, and I like that the customizations can be applied to existing characters.

I am starting to hope that we might see a ‘race squish’ someday where allied race are rolled in to their parent race as extra customizations options. They can still be locked behind achievements, but let us apply the fun new things we’ve unlocked to our existing characters.

There would be some complications. Kul Tiran Humans are very different than Stormwind Humans, but now that we have body type as an option instead of gender, they should be no problem. A race squish would make racial abilities a little complicated. I do not think that dumping all the existing racial abilities on the the combined race makes sense, but I think that with Dragonflight, we are getting rid of a system that could be recycled as a good solution. The talent structure that is going away is very limited in how many options you have, and how many you can have active. Those limitations would fit racial abilities very well. Existing abilities could be moved in to columns that could be selected either at character creation, or through leveling. Most races will need abilities added. Filling out their lists of abilities opens up the opportunity to give more direct parity of racial abilities across factions.

For example, Gnomes and Mechagnomes are combined to one race. They would have a column of abilities to select from based on Gnomeregan Gnomes, and a column of traits to pick based on Mechagon Mechagnomes. To round out the selections, we pull the racial traits of a Horde group that has abilities of a similar theme to gnomes, like Bilgewater Cartel Goblins. This would give people more freedom to pick a race based on aesthetic. No need to worry about which racial abilities feel required.

It adds more RP flavor to each individual character. You could have a character that had lived in several different places that picked up cultural traditions from all of them, or stick to the one background, or if you don’t care about any of that, pick the ones that best match your class and playstyle.

The largest hurdle I see is Vulpera. They are not a subset of an existing race, they are a whole new group all to themselves. Balancing that out would mean either adding one new race to the Alliance, or having a Horde race become truly neutral. Either of those are likely to cause a lot of discontent with the player base.

Please try not to focus on which trait I put at which level, or how I filled in the holes where gnomes have less abilities than goblins. I was trying not make sure there were enough tiers that no race would lose any abilities, so there were some placeholder abilities I threw in. Not all the abilities would need to be location themed. Orcs, would probably get Blackrock, Warsong, and Mag’har as their options. Gilneans could have something like Worgen Curse, Touch of Undeath, and Purified.

Reorganizing these existing abilities creates a ton of RP flavor and makes balancing race/faction abilities practically automatic.

Another Reason to Like Gnomes

I know it’s an unpopular opinion at the moment, but I like Sylvanas Windrunner in Battle for Azeroth. She has done horrible terrible things that I will always condemn out of character, which has made me wonder why I still like her in spite of these atrocities. I think the answer is Motivation. Sylvanas clearly has goals and is actively flexing her agency to accomplish those goals. This is why a lot of villains are popular.

While reminiscing about Vanilla Warcraft I came to the conclusion that gnomes are the most Motivated race. Their city is in a shambles, but they are actively working towards retaking it. You run in to gnomes all over Azeroth (not many, but still widely scattered) and plenty of them explicitly state that they are where they are doing research on how to fix Gnomeregan.

No other group in Vanilla WoW had such a clear and driving goal at such a high level. The trolls were not as dedicated to reclaiming the Echo Isles (which they managed to 100% do anyway.)

I’ve lamented in the past that Gnomes had very little identity outside of Engineering. It’s an idea that I feel like doesn’t give gnomes enough credit and is a bias I myself had to take a hard look at to get around. Yes, engineering is important to them, and yes it’s one of the main things that attracted me to the race, but being a one trick pony always gets boring, no matter how good the one trick is.

I don’t see reclaiming Gnomeregan the same way I did in the past. It was not something I wanted in the background of my lighthearted, carefree race. Now instead of seeing a tragedy that drove gnomes from there home, I see the rally to conquer a common foe, to return to homes that had been stolen, and I know that, to some extent, anytime I see another gnome our characters have that in common.

That unifying goal give gnomes as a whole a personality that is hard to match. Worgen find themselves in this situation more than anyone right now. Goblins, Night elves and Undead are displaced, but their homes are essentially gone, and now they will have to find a new one. They will all set out in different directions for new homes. While the opposite is true for gnomes they have all set their course together with a common destination.

“For Gnomeregan” is different than “For the Horde” the horde rally cry is basically “Go Team!”. The Horde has the Horde, but we don’t have Gnomeregan, it’s something we are striving for.

I’m really happy Mechagon exists. It adds new gnome content without removing this large driving factor. The gnomes having a capital city is something I would love to see, and I do genuinely enjoy the peeks we are offered in to the current state of Gnomeregan by the pet battle dungeon and Heritage armor quests, and I think there is room for a raid in there someday, but I don’t think I want to see gnomes lose their white whale. Gnomeregan will always be a dungeon and that’s good, because it gives us purpose.

Are Gnomes Heroes?

Are there any gnome heroes in World of Warcraft? I know there are a few notable gnome charaters, but do any of them qualify as true heroes? Do player gnomes even live up to the definition?

Let’s start with a solid definition of what it means to be a hero. I’m going to be using the Hero’s Journey as a template.

Let’s look at Mekkatorque and his progression through the Hero’s Journey.

1. Status Quo. Mekkatorque has been leader of gnomes for a long time.

2. Call to action. The Invation of Gnomeregan. The quite orderly city of Gnomeregan is invaded by troggs. Mekkatorque takes steps to defend it.

3. Refusal of the call. In most stories the hero doubts their own ability to rise to the challenge. Mekkatorque’s refusal is diffrent. He refuses to reach out to the Alliance for assistance.

4. The Mentor. The Fall of Gnomeregan. Gelbin’s ‘mentor’ is his advisor Sicco Thermaplugg. Thermaplugg takes action that forces Mekkatorque’s hand.

5. Crossing the threshold. Gnomeregan must be abandoned. The gnomes must leave their orderly society and forge a new existance on the foreign and wartorn surface.

6. Trials. War with the Horde flaires up, the Burnimg Crusade happens, and the war in Northrend. The players participate in these events, but Gelbin does not.

7: Approach. Operation: Gnomeregan. Moira takes the throne in Ironforge and evicts the gnomes. For the second time, Mekkatorque’s hand is forced.

8: Ordeal. Cut Short. Gelbin is trapped alone in his own office. He confronts his personal guilt for the tragedy, he must defeat 3 troggs unarmed, and finally look the gnome who betrayed him in the eyes. Gelbin’s ordeal here is primarily mental, finding the strength to accept and move past what has happened.

9: Reward: Gelbin founds New Tinker Town. His confrontation with Thermaplugg ended in a stalemate so Gnomeregan remains out of reach. Mekkatorque’s journey seems to have has stalled.

10: The road back. Gnomeregan is being cleansed. We know that some sectors have been reclaimed. The G-team and S.A.F.E. have agents all over the place restoring order and rebuilding.

11: Atonenment. Have the gnomes forgiven the High Tinker? No, and they can’t because they never blamed him. Perhaps if we see a gnome election in the future this stage could be satisfactorily resolved.

12: Return: This will be when Mekkatorque stands as High Tinker of Gnomeregan once again. A better, wiser ruler for the experiences he has had.

Clearly Mekkatorque has not finished this journey, but he acts like he has. His appearances in the Siege of Orgrimmar,  the Broken Shore, and at the Battle for Undercity are the actions of a transformed gnome. Clearly he has completed the journey. Unfortunatly for us it seems like much of his adventures happened off screen.

And what of player gnomes? Mekkatorque’s story is our story. The amount of that story that takes place off screen is a problem for us. A new gnome starts right at stage 5. We are immediately forced across the threshold in to our trials. Their is no status quo for gnomes. We never see who they are in the beginning so we have no idea how their adventures change them.

Idealy our starting zone would take us from steps 1-5. The worgen have an amazing starting zone that really informs the players who they are, who Genn is and what has called them out in to the wider world.

It is a shame that the gnome starting experiance doesn’t start before the invation of Gnomeregan. I hope that when gnomes get an allied race, their introduction will give them the background they need.

What Gnomes Want

I put up this poll the other day.  I am afraid I phrased it very poorly due to the limitations of Twitter.

Q for Gnome Fans: What would you rather read?
History of the race?
Current state of Gnomeregan?
Gnome adventures all over Azeroth?#Warcraft

— Sicco Thermaplugg (@SiccoThermaplug) July 26, 2017

History of the race was clear enough.  We have deep history stories about elves and dwarves, but not much about gnomes.

When I say Gnomeregan’s Status, I feel like that was a lot more narrow than what it could have been.  What gnomes really want to see is a normal functioning gnome society.  All the gnome outposts, including New Tinkertown are places that have been throw together in a hurry by refugees.  We want to see what gnomes look like at their best, when they’ve had time to apply themselves and build a stable society.

Gnome adventures means gnome heroes.  We need more gnomes that gnome player can comfortably emulate.  An example of what a paragon of gnomish-ness looks like when filter through the lens of class, spec, or any profession OTHER THAN engineering.  Gnomes that remind us that even though we don’t have a city, we do still fit in on Azeroth.

My machines are the future! They’ll destroy you all!

For 10 years of people have been busting open my safe  and stealing my designs!  Now I’m seeing cheap knock off’s EVERYWHERE!  Where are my royalties!?  Where is my CREDIT!  Where is the RESPECT!  The worst are the GOBLIN versions.  All the grace and subtly is lost!

 

I won.

My goal was always to get Gnomes out of Gnomeregan and exploring Azeroth and making new gnome settlements.

Toshley’s Station, Fizzcrank Airstrip, heck even New Tinker Town are all MY Vision, MY Legacy!

The cost to Gnomeregan was high, but the gnome race has been reforged in the way I always saw them.  Fighting for a larger place in the world!

Another Trogg Solution

I’ve already outlined my ideas for using Gearmaster Mechazod to purify Leper Gnomes by ‘removing’ the ‘Curse of the Flesh’.  I am beginning to wonder is the same process would work on troggs.

There are rumors that say troggs used to be dwarves or some such non-sense.  But if the Gearmaster can turn a gnome in to a Mechagnome, why couldn’t he turn a trogg in to a dwarf?  or really anything more useful than a trogg!

Manifest Destiny!

My main platform as candidate for High Tinker remains what it has ALWAYS been.  Manifest Destiny of the Gnomish Race across Azeroth.  It just makes sense.  No other group has the technical expertise of Gnomeregan.

Every sovereign nation on Azeroth could be made better with Gnomish Technology, and we should be present in all those places introducing and maintaining them for the smaller minded races.  If brains were height, gnomes would tower over all!  It’s time for gnomes to stand up and take their place in history!

Mekkatorque wants to give you a city, I want to give you THE WORLD!

The Irradiation Problem

I am aware that if I want gnomes to return to Gnomeregan I have to clean up the mess.  My plan is to ‘acquire’ the head of Gearmaster Mechazod and learn his de-cursive technique.  Once that has been mastered we can turn all my leper gnomes in to Mechagnomes.  Mechagnomes are not affected my the irradiation process.  Once the halls of Gnomeregan have been restored.  We use the re-cursive tool to turn the mechagnomes back in to fleshy gnomes.  That gets Gnomeregan Clean, AND cures the leprosy.

I don’t see Mekkatorque coming up with BRILLIANT plans like that!